Seeing the world through the Nurse's Eye

Year: 2021 (Page 1 of 2)

A year later…

From youngest to oldest, personal reflections on our first year living in England

Alvin-

Alvin exploring Cuckmere Haven

Written in his own words, edited ever so slightly for ease of reading

Our street, Honeysuckle, has a bunch of children even children all the way down the street like Tommy, Riley, Ed, Kiara…Usually we play hide n’ seek. But now we play home. Home is where we have a home and we live in it, I am the dad and Rebekah is the mom and we have powers. The children are Harriette and George. I always have electric powers and George always has nature power. With the powers I can make fire and George can turn into different animals so if he was a cat he can track down bad guys, it is fun! Another big difference is that they are more children here.

a small portion of kids that gather daily to play
Honeysuckle Close early in the morning

And there are more foot paths; it is like walking is our driving. Walking has made my legs feel stronger.

The food is also more protective (less sugar). There are also more shops that sell different types of foods. My favorite is a little coffee shop that sells cakes; it is only like a mile away.

In the last year I have learned that you can’t us kids messenger (Facebook kids’ messenger) because they (England) are more protected. And schooling is better because you are learning longer words like breathe, tumultuous, or magnificent.  They teach us French, but I don’t know French totally yet.

Mrs. Jones is a really cool teacher. She is a teacher at Stanmore Primary, she teaches Birch class. Mrs. Jones ALWAYS makes learning fun. Like one time someone was not looking at her and she went up to them and made a funny face and said “lally lally lally.”

In England I feel more respected, I have more friends, and there are more people that see me.

Alvin’s key points he wanted to include in his piece

Tamara

England has grabbed me and shaken me to the core. But I had it coming, I did move here in the middle of a pandemic, pre vaccine. A year later and life here has changed me.

1/3 Just Pain Hard

The first third of the year was hard. Climbing the peak of the pandemic and dealing with the lows of lockdown. I had to learn to work through the stress. I imagine it as a tunnel to walk through, one step at a time, day by day and not a place to reside. We, Gary, Alvin and I, found solace in our adventure walks. Shops, restaurants, library everything was closed, so we walked. We discovered new paths admiring the old buildings along the way and took in the many rolling hills. With everything closed the neighbors opened their doors and kids came out play.

2/3 A Loosening Grip

The second third of the year the grip of the pandemic loosened. We got our vaccine. Shops opened and I thought hard about which errands were actually necessary versus manufactured to make my life busy. Do we really need a container for all the dog treats or is the box they have been in for the last six months good enough? Productivity=Purpose, right? Is this a revelation or midlife crisis? Or post pandemic life crisis? I started to really look at how I used to fill my days and how I will now, with a clean slate, use my time. I am more aware of where my day goes and slowly I have started to see the greater value of a long walk versus finding that perfect dog treat container. Or sitting in the middle of field just with my thoughts. Slowly I am learning these pleasures and having them be guilt free.

3/3 A New Normal

The final third of the year has evolved into a new normal. We are traveling and exploring as we had planned pre pandemic but with a new twist since they require a pre departure COVID test. With the ability to explore new places at my fingertips I realized I do not want to drink (alcohol). I turn away what use to be a regular beer. I want to be there for it all, I want to be more attuned with my life.  And a drink now is more of a setback since it will results in haziness the following day. Like I discovered during the second third of the year, time is precious and how we spend it is not something to be overlooked.  In my new world alcohol takes away from the ability to take in everything around me. Don’t get me wrong, I will not turn down a coworker’s invite to the pub, but I will make sure to just to have one because tomorrow I want to be able to run out the front door and take in a new adventures.

A year later…

A year later and I am slowly getting used to being happy and stress-free? England is that guy you cannot fall in love with because you know it will never work out, you have different plans for the future. But you just can’t help yourself, every time you look in a different direction he surprises you with yet another spectacular view or a hidden treasure. I smiled as I road into work the other day and a little orange chested robin brush against my helmet, as if to say hello.  Or the pop up Malaysian restaurant hidden within the walls of the Mucky Duck Pub.

I am not the same and I will never be. England has changed me. I have learned to sit in the front yard, watch the kids play, talk to the neighbors and to know that is enough. Those are the real treasures.

Gary

“What have you learned (learnt) in England over the past year?” This was the question posed to me after being here for 10 months. At first I thought ‘she must be working in metric years.’  But on further thought our adventure in England started quite a while before we landed here.

As we sat on our deck in Tacoma Washington last summer, the world in the grip of a deadly virus that still had no vaccine, my passport seemingly lost in a shutdown renewal system, Tamara with work visa in hand but all offices closed that could process mine and Alvin’s, we posed a question to each other: “is it the right time to move to England?”  It was a short discussion. More or less confirming out loud what we knew in our hearts.  We could wait out Covid just as well in England as we could in the U.S..

Keep in mind MANY of these “things I have learnt” are actually things I am learning or still fighting to accept. So don’t hold me hard and fast to lessons learnt.

Lesson One

Lesson One: My wife’s “crazy ideas” are not always all that crazy. Example? “I heard there is a visa office that has opened in the Columbia Center in Seattle. They have no phone, or any way to make an appointment online at this time. Tomorrow we are going up to Seattle and trying to get your and Alvin’s visas.”  (Seattle,: 725,000 people. Columbia Center: 76 stories, 1,500,000 sq ft) Long story short, it worked out, only because we went on that day, at that time.

On arrival in England, I have learnt to say learnt, instead of learned. There are a slew of other words that are either new to me or pronounced differently. You walk on the pavement, not the sidewalk. Aluminum is far to easy to pronounce, so let’s say aluMINium. Washing up liquid, not dish soap.The list goes on. You have to live it. It’s lovely.

Walking: People do walk here. If I’m walking the half mile to the grocery or mile and a half into town, I am not the only one. If it’s raining, you grab your brellie and your Wellies. (Umbrella and boots)

Lesson Two: Less is more

The house we are renting is about 45% the size of the one back home. The yard is half the size, at best. Despite needing updating and remodeling, the area is just fine. Our salaries have been cut in half and we only recently realized it. We are VERY comfortable.

Retirement

Retirement is a bit different than I thought. Not being a planner, I just figured I would take it as it came, when it came. I married a planner though. England is a perfect segue to the rest of my life. It has opened my eyes to a whole world of possibilities. I can move to another country and still be home.

I keep busy with house work, walking to the store and town and doing things within reason to the house we rent since the separated owners seem to argue over which of them should do it. So, I’ve learnt that after owning homes for so many years, it is not in my nature to rent.

Lesson 3: Holidays

Eggnog is not a thing here. Not a single carton at the local grocery during the holidays. I got an idea…’Starbucks has egg nog lattes. I’ll see if I can get some there.’ No. They have a local dairy that makes batches special for them and they do not sell them. I also made hot butter rum batter last year. It was new to everybody I introduced it to. Thanksgiving? Nope! Want fireworks? Forget about Fourth of July, try Guy Fawkes Day.

Fireworks from Whiteshute Ridge 2020 for Guy Fawkes Day

But the true lesson…

But the biggest thing I learnt was that 4,500 miles away from where I spent the first 61 years of my life, I had a community full of incredible friends waiting for me to find them. As my brother Dave said, “it’s like you went off to college.”

My new normal

I used to look out into a spacious waiting room with an enclosed Chihuly art piece tucked in the corner. At times it was bursting with ill children waiting to be seen, all under my supervision. I would run through my head, recalibrating who was sickest, who was in need of analgesia, or who needed a new set of vital signs. I had the independence to administer medication without a second check since it was all computerized. My old world, one which is fading now. The current waiting room, or closet thing to it here, is a skinny white tent with a queue of patients waiting to be seen. At times the line extends into the parking lot.

I have learned (or learnt) to be a nurse in a new capacity. Fellow international nurses say you take a step down from the autonomy you held back home, but I think of it more as a side step. I am no longer wearing a stethoscope every day, nor do I know the results of all my patients, but in exchange I get to talk to them and learn their stories. By taking that side step I am able to look around and observe the difference in health care

Is care better?

In the Emergency Department (A&E) care is more efficient. Is efficiency better? The fact is eighty percent of patients get their disposition in less than four hours. Almost every patient with an acute complaint (ESI 3 or higher) will get an IV (cannula), labs (bloods) including a venous blood gas, EKG (ECG), and a COVID swab on arrival. An hour later with lab results in hand (the doctor’s not mine) you know whether the chest pain needs a cardiology consult, additional work up and admission.

A venous gas result is ready in less than two minutes and very helpful in diagnosing a septic patient or a patient with diabetes ketoacidosis

Most patients admission is to the Emergency Medical Assessment Unit EMAU. This is where further evaluation is completed. Such as CT scans, heart rate control, or potassium replacement. EMAU provides care up to a progressive care unit (PCU) level. If the work up extends past a 24 hour period the patient will then move to a specialized ward. General practitioner (GP aka PCP) also directly admit to EMAU bypassing the A&E all together. 

A typical patient in our A&E is a little old man curled with age and his tweed cap faithfully at his side. The one in my head arrived via ambulance with “long lie” due to being “off legs.” In other words he was found on the floor after an extended period of time by his carer. due to leg weakness. He took the time to read my name badge and it struck a chord in me. Reminding me of the value of being called by your name.  He received the work up previously mentioned but even with his complex history everything came back normal. In these situations we arrange an In Reach evaluation.

The In Reach Team

In Reach is team at the hospital that evaluates the patient and their needs to be able to stay at home. The assessment includes checking mobility, family support, and overall safety of living conditions. The team provides the patient with appropriate assistive devices, arranges for district nurse visits or meals on wheels.

No More Pelvic Exams

Diagnostic studies must be justified. Even a head computed tomography (CT) scan must be accompanied by altered level of conscience or blunt head trauma with persistent vomiting. Elevated inflammatory markers is the only way to land an abdominal ultrasound. And even at that, it will be scheduled for the following morning, not in the A&E. If you suspect acute appendicitis the patient goes directly to the operating room/theatres.

A young female with upper abdominal pain will get the work up mentioned and sent home to follow up with their GP. More weight is placed on the physical assessment versus jumping to a CT scan. Children that present with abdominal pain first get an assessment, then urine analysis, possibly blood work but an ultrasound will only be done if deemed necessary after blood results. We are more likely to schedule it as an outpatient or to monitor the child overnight. I am torn to which is better, at times things are missed when you skip the scan or an ultrasound but then again you do not always need it. Things here are not better or worse, just different.

A female with lower abdominal pain or a pregnancy complaint will get stabilized then sent to the OBGYN ward in a neighbouring building. A young pregnant woman with heavy bleeding presented via triage the other day. After I obtained her vital signs I paged (bleeped) the GYN doctor and sent her directly to the OBGYN ward. Pelvic exams are not done in the A&E! At first sending a patient to another building just because they required pelvic exam seemed foreign. Now, it just is.

What about Sexually Transmitted Diseases?

No emergency treatment required therefore patients get directed to a specialized clinic. The sexual health clinic offers contraception, free condoms, testing for sexually transmitted infections including HIV.

Stroke Team

The hospital, and most hospitals in the NHS, have a dedicated stroke team. The team consists of a doctor and health practitioner. The health practitioners are trained in National Institutes of Health Stroke Scale (NIHSS) assessment. The NIHSS is a systematic assessment tool that provides a quantitative measure of stroke-related neurologic deficit. In addition to placing IVs, determining if the patient will require thrombolytic intervention (“the clot buster drug”) and transport the patient to CT. The doctor does the formal admission and will be present if thrombolytics are administered. A stroke patient will get their evaluation by the stroke team and admitted within a couple of hours. The A&E nurse will assist with paper work, medication administration, but no need to transport the patient for CT or do the NIHSS assessment.

Minor Complaints

When I started, I was blown away when an Emergency Nurse Practitioner (ENP) guided a smartly dressed woman directly into one of their exam rooms. The chief complaint was a foreign object in her ear. Turns out it was a piece of her hearing aid. I never really saw the patient, only glance at her in passing, she bypassed triage. The ENP took the chart, took the foreign object out, did one quick set of vital signs and discharge her. The staff nurses do not get congested with these patients. Other patients that will get seen by the ENP directly are limb injuries such as a sprained ankle or a simple laceration.

Minor complaints (ESI 4/5) get seen by ENPs, a different scope of practice than back home. For example, an ENP in England would not just evaluate a simple urinary tract infection. But being previous A&E nurses, they do everything from start to finish. The triage, wound care, x-ray ordering and reading, plastering (applying a cast) all without any help from an ER tech or another nurse. ENPs are very independent and hold their own.

Seeing things from a different side

Learning to see things under a different light reminded me of Begonia, a stern retired teacher we stayed with during our travels in Spain. She could not brush off her years of teaching and was always sharing her wisdom. During our final night, I was complaining about the world’s agonies and she grabbed my hand and held it up. She was looking at the back side with the cracks on my skin and I was looking at my palm. Then she said “we are both looking at your hand, right? But we are looking at two very different things because of where we sit.”

When I arrived I saw thing from the American view, now I see them from the other side.

A Sundry of Difference

-We do not administer narcotics instead we give paracetamol IV. I have given morphine less than a dozen times in the last year.

-Patient to nurse ratios are 5:1, pediatrics 8:1, and ICU level patients 3:2

-A medical cold blue is an incoming sick patient not a cardiac or respiratory arrest. Those area announced as a cardiac/respiratory arrest.

-No ambulance phone just a screen, we only get a phone call if the patient requires a resuscitation bed.

How has all this changed me as a nurse?

I have had to recalibrate how I see myself and emergency care. It is no longer about trying to find the mystery diagnosis or a reason for admission. It is now about figuring out if the patient needs immediate treatment or what support they may need from the community to lead a healthy life at home.

Back home I am just another nurse, but here due to the vast difference in training I am a source of knowledge. I have learned to carry that knowledge carefully and use it as a mean to elevate those around me.  A personal goal is to teach the newly arrived foreign nurses of the intrinsic difference in England. I have learned to Trust myself a little more and not be afraid to have voice, embracing my American heritage. I now introduce myself as the American nurse working for the NHS.

Mental Capacity-The Voice of Your Patient

Mental capacity is the ability to make and communicate our own decisions. In the United States healthcare setting mental capacity is not a phrase we often hear. The term is mostly applied to legal proceeding. But in England is it is part of the initial Accidents & Emergency (A&E) aka Emergency Department assessment and our daily medical jargon.

One of the first questions asked as part of the consent to treatment is Does Patient have Capacity?

So how do I assess a person’s mental status back home? We do a quick assessment asking the patient a standard set of questions. What is your name? Where are you? What year/month/date is it? Why are you here? These questions determines whether the patient is alert (A) and oriented (O) to person (name), place (hospital, town), time, and situation. The short hand of full mental capacity is they are A and O x 4. Or a person with dementia you might say they are A and O x 3 minus time. Neither of these are used in England, rather you state whether or not they are confused or if they have mental capacity. But capacity is a fluid thing, and whether or not a patient holds it can change from one moment to the next, as I discovered during the peak of the pandemic.

Getting your needs met…

He was a cantankerous cunning man to say the least. He arrived to the resuscitation area barrel chested with an oxygen level of 67%, only responsive to verbal stimuli. We started our symphony of actions: oxygen delivery, intravenous access placement, arterial blood gas, and cardiac monitoring among other things. He had a history of chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, COPD, and had not been using his home continuous positive airway pressure CPAP machine for the last week.  The bustling aroused him, no longer hypoxic, he clearly knew where he was.

With his alertness he vocalized his needs; he wanted a chair to sit in. I explained we did not have any chairs in the resuscitation area. I offer pillows and repositioning for comfort, he declined. Then his bodily functions kicked in and he wanted to use the loo. As I handed him the urinal bottle with a coy look he said “that’s the wrong end.” I told him I would bring a bedside commode; he glared straight into my eyes and said “never” and I knew he meant it. I put forth my defense stating he needed to remain on the monitor and he required oxygen. He rebutted with the fact both are portable.

Begrudgingly I obtain and wheelchair and assisted him into it. As we were about to wheel off he held his hand up to stop me, stating he no longer had to go but with a twinkle in his eye he said “this will do.” And with that he had the chair he wanted to sit in. He duped me. I still smile seeing him proudly sit in his wheelchair defending his own needs, a man that first arrive barely conscience.

He did not want the mask…

The evening proceeded with him being placed on Bi-PAP and removing the lifesaving pressurized oxygen mask every five minutes or so.  Both myself and my colleagues struggling to convince him to put it back on. He had previously stated in writing that he did not want to be intubate, (have a tube and machine breath for him) or have CPR done if his heart was to stop. We confirmed these were still his wishes.  In England we use the term ceiling of care:  the highest level of care you provide the patient. His ceiling of care was Bi-PAP. The nurse and I were constantly struggling to determine if he was capable of understanding what it meant not to wear the Bi-PAP mask.  We asked him direct questions

“Do you understand what will happen if you do not wear the mask that is providing you with oxygen?”

Looking at us straight in the eye he responded “yes, I will stop breathing” taking a breath he continued “and I will die”. At one point I asked him why he wanted to die. With a glum expression he just looked away and put the mask back on.

His calloused hands had been pushing me away or shooing me off throughout me shift.  I knew I could not force the mask on his face, so I just waited. I was trying to make him understand through words and pointing at the monitor, showing a slowly depleting oxygen level 74%, 73%, 70% till his eyes closed and his body soften allowing me to put the mask on without resistance. Two minutes later with appropriate oxygenation he would regain his feistiness and the mask would come off again. And the measure would repeat. 

Did he have mental capacity? Or was he too hypoxic, (lack of oxygen) or hypercapnic, (too much carbon dioxide in the blood) to truly understand his actions.

What is Mental Capacity?

Mental capacity assessment is part of 2005 The Mental Capacity Act of the United Kingdom applying to England and Wales. It is time and decision specific, and can fluctuate over time. The five statutory principles consist of one, presumption of capacity. Second, supporting the patient to make a decision. Third, knowing that unwise or eccentric decisions do not prove a lack of capacity. Fourth, confirming the decision is in the patient’s best interest. And lastly, that the least restrictive intervention should be sought.

The first stage of an assessment of capacity is to determine if the person has an impairment or disturbance in the functioning of their mind or brain. If not, the assessment ends, they have capacity. A disturbance could be altered mental status due to intoxication, learning disability, mental health condition or dementia.

In stage two of the assessment you determine if the person retain information to make the decision; situation awareness and repeating it back. If yes, can the person use the information as part of the decision process? Can they communicate the decision and understand the information and consequences. 

Did he have capacity?

The mental capacity of the heartwarming cantankerous gentleman was intact. He did have an impairment of the brain, hypoxia, but he was able to answer everything appropriately and understood very clearly the consequences of his action.

Mental health concerns such as self-harm or a suicide attempt get the same assessment. An elegantly dressed woman addicted to codeine presented to the A&E with a paracetamol (acetaminophen / Tylenol) overdose. She was no longer able obtain straight codeine and had resorted to the combo tablets, co-codamol (Tylenol #3 in the United States).  She told me all her debt had been recently settled and things were all arranged, so what was the point. Her addiction was taking over her life and she was ready to give in.

Mental Health and Mental Capacity, a quick glance

She came into the A&E voluntarily and verbalized the consequences of her actions; permanent liver damage with the paracetamol (acetaminophen) overdose and respiratory depression with codeine overdose. She had mental capacity. And with that capacity she was also allowed to go smoke outside with a hospital escort. The hospital is a no smoking facility but it does provide an outside smoking area for patients. As one nurse put it, the patient understands the harm of smoking and who are we to take away that freedom just because they came to the hospital.

On a side note…

(I feel in the United States we preach about our freedoms but you lose many of them the moment you walk through the hospital doors. Like the freedom to smoke. And your care is dependent on your insurance coverage, therefore how free are we really? But I will leave that discussion for another day.)

We administered the antidote for the overdose after she returned from having “her fag” (cigarette). With in an hour she was evaluated by a mental health nurse. I was not part of the mental health evaluation but it is like a mini therapy session to evaluate the patient’s risk of self-harm. Prior to the mental health nurse evaluation, they will access a background check and review the patient’s history. Therefore, once the mental health nurse arrives, they are aware of the patient’s mental health history, social history and community resource the patient has accessed.

In this instance the patient presented with para suicidal behavior. Parasuicide is an apparent attempt at suicide, commonly called a suicidal gesture, in which the aim is not death. For example, a sub lethal drug overdose or wrist cutting. The patient was not content with her evaluation and proceeded to self-discharge, leaving against medical advice. Since she had full capacity she was allowed to leave even though she had come in with a suicide attempt.

After speaking with the mental health nurse it turned out the patient had been offered many resources and declined the services.  It reminded me of my cantankerous man. We can provide the oxygen mask but they have to want it on for it to makes a difference.

Remembering back home

I recall a mental health nurse relaying to me “we cannot hold them against their will if they have full mental capacity.” Still fresh are years of stripping people of their belonging, clothing, cell phones and dressing them in spiced color scrubs. All personal belongings would be placed in a secure locker only to be released at time of discharge. Followed by a metal detector wand search and then leaving them in a hollow room for hours at times without a television or clock. A certified nursing assistance would be sitting outside the room watching their movements or at times looking at their own phone. An environment easily to induce mental instability, don’t you think? 

At what point do we as health care providers walk away and let things be? What is our responsibility to the patient, if the patient does not want our help?

Which way is better? In the USA we strip patients of their freedom when they present with a self-harm presentation. In the England there is the ability to look at the whole picture and take their mental capacity into account. Mental health though is a topic that I will go delve into more detail in the coming months.

Listening to patient

But, learning to walk away from a patient that no longer wants your help is not a natural instinct for nurses or any healthcare professional. Although, it is a task that I am learning to do, because when it comes down to it, it is not about me but about the patient. Like the saying goes, you can bring a horse to water but you can’t make it drink. Part of being a nurse is learning to work through the feeling that you cannot help everyone. At times helping is just being there for them, no advice, no suggestions, just listening. 

Mental capacity is there to remind us that they still have a voice, even if it is one we don’t agree with. Like the mandate states, eccentricity does not give way to mental capacity. Listening to what they want and why, even if it means bringing them that damn chair against your nursing judgement. 

Restraining Children- a new perspective

Disclosure: This is a reflective piece on the manner in which a pediatric mental health crisis is being handled by two different health systems in two parts of the world. The statements written here are my own personal opinions, and not reflective of the hospitals that have employed me. Mental health is a complex subject and this reflection is only a pin point of information on the topic. Patient details have been changed to maintain patient privacy.

The Patient, A Child

The ambulance phone rings alerting me of an incoming patient: a teenager who is refusing care, and will be arriving in police custody. The patient has had increase aggressive behavior the last two days leading to assaulting multiple family members today. He has behavioral disorders, and possibly undiagnosed mental health issues.

The patient arrives handcuffed and is brought to a bed for evaluation. He refuses to have his vital signs check, and hurls his body towards anyone that gets close. The police are blocking the door after his third attempt to bolt out. I attempt to reason with him, talking in a calm steady voice. “We want to help you and keep you safe. I need to check your blood pressure.” But as I get close, he tries to bite me. He glares into my eyes as he gathers his spit in his mouth, preparing to send it my way.  I take a step back, a safety stance, but with space, he starts banging his head against his knees. It doesn’t provide enough harm, and he moves towards the head rail.

I stop a moment and try to imagine what it is to be this child. You are out of control. You do not know how to gain control of your body again. You have never been given the tools to cope with big emotions. You are mad at yourself for hurting your family. You are unable to go home.

Is home a safe place? The police are the ones who took you away. Can you Trust them? No one is advocating for you. Everyone talks about you as though you are not there. What adult has ever helped you out?

As a nurse, I am blinded to his home environment. I only get a glimpse of it from the police report. But one thing is clear, his home life is unpredictable and unstable.

One of the hardest parts of my job has been placing children in four-point restraints, the strapping down of each of their limbs to prevent violent behavior. I will never get used to it, nor should I. Prior to placing a patient in restraints, whether child or adult, I do attempt to deescalate the situation, verbally and environmentally.

A photo I sent Gary after getting bit by a patient from 2019. Thankfully the two layers of clothing protect me from any skin breakage.

In the United States

This happened often during my years working in the United States; this patient, this situation, a familiar one. Back home the patient would have been strapped down soon after arrival. The idea behind restraints is to protect the patient and the staff from harm. The patient is then medicated with an appropriate sedative via an intramuscular injection. Only after the patient is sedated are the four-point restraints removed. Usually, we would remove the restraints within an hour, but during that time, we complete the blood work, including an alcohol level and drug test. The patient is continuously monitored one to one, one patient to one staff member.

Once the patient is medically cleared, a consultation by a social worker is started with a final disposition to either a mental health facility, or back home with community support. This process can take as little as three hours, or as long as three weeks, depending the complexity of the case. We always keep the threat of restraints available in case the patient attempts to harm staff, or themselves. There are times I remember where a patient would be restrained three or four times over a 24-hour period.

Photo credit: https://emcrit.org/emcrit/human-bondage-chemical-takedown/

In England

Now, working in England, I find the use of four-point restraints extremely rare. After six months here, I have yet to see it done. Instead, I find the practice is to guard ourselves against the patient. If restraining the patient is required, security personnel apply the restraints. It is so rare used that nurses are not trained in restraints. You are not even allowed to restrain a toddler with a blanket hold for suturing.

On a side note, one of the most magical things I have seen in A&E (Accident and Emergency, the British equivalent to the American ER) is a three-year-old with a deep laceration being sutured while standing with only the use of topical analgesia (LET cream) and distraction.

It was only after six months here in England I faced my first pediatric patient in a full-blown mental health crisis. When the police brought him in, handcuffed, I could not use my American training of putting him in restraints, or even hold him down to protect myself. I had to maintain a safe distance, and gently use the deescalating techniques I had learned through my years of nursing.

None of them worked. He was attempting to jump off the hospital bed, hitting his head against his knee, and trying to bite me, and the police. He yelled, “Don’t touch me!” And “Let me go. I want to go home.” Through short clear statements, we attempted to explain to him that we wanted to help him, that we wanted to keep him safe. But by this time, his rational thought process was gone. He was in fight, or flight mode. We removed the handcuffs in an attempt to provide comfort, and present the A&E as a safe place, but it only allowed him the freedom to swing his arms more fiercely.

Photo Credit: https://www.yalemedicine.org/conditions/defiant-children

Holding him down for a moment, we managed to administer two intramuscular injections of a benzodiazepine, Rapid tranquillization, since he was placing himself and others at risk, per policy. As the medication worked to slow down the surge of neurotransmitters, he became limber and stood like an overcooked noodle. He still refused to sit on the bed. The banging against the wall continued, but now played out in slow motion, allowing me to place my hand, and then a pillow, between his head and the wall.

Two hours after his arrival, I found myself in a sort of dance with him. I stood nearby, my arms in an arc, guarding his every move, ready to catch him if he fell. I spent another hour sidestepping and monitoring his every move, never touching him, or holding him down. Finally, tired, he sat on the floor, still unwilling to fully let his guard down. There, in a closed-off hallway, still sitting, he fell asleep. I let him sleep an hour, and when I gently woke him up; I could calmly move him onto a bed. Still guarded, he fell back asleep sitting up on the bed. I gently nudged him into a prone position once he was sound asleep. No blood tests were done. He was transferred to the pediatric ward with a designated mental health nurse. After the patient would wake up, he would get a full mental health evaluation by a designated mental health provider, all to be done within a day.

After so many years of putting children and adults in physical restraints, strapped down to a bed, and having to scratch their nose for them, I am glad to know I can take a break from this for now.  The comfort for me lies knowing that, even though this patient will have trauma from this event, being tied down to bed will not be one of them. And even though it required me to “dance” with him for over four hours, applying chemical restraints with intramuscular injections, it was physically harder, but emotionally, much lighter – probably, I think, for both of us.

10 Differences in the A&E versus ER

1. A&E (Accidents and Emergency) not ER/ED

2. Medication administration: no Pyxis or pharmacy. You prepare all your own medication after searching for it in the cupboard. This includes high alert medications such as insulin or norepinephrine infusions

3. Triage is the only time computer documentation is done. Everything else is paper charting. However, there are plans in the works to convert to a computer charting program in April. This could be epic!

Only one computer for a group of nurses is need

4. A patient will get admitted while being worked up. No admitting diagnosis needed, query appendicitis is enough. The ultrasound or CT will be done on the floor/ward. In addition, a patient will transition to the floor/ward typically in less than 4 hours. For example yesterday we had a stroke patient admitted after their head CT but prior to receiving the results.

5. Every patient gets a venous blood gas as part of their immediate work up

Venous Gas Machine

6. As a nurse, you can wear a stethoscope, but expect to be mistaken for a doctor if you do.

7. You wear a plastic disposable apron and you change it with every patient. I got a look of disgust when I mentioned we don’t use them in the U.S.A. . . “What do you do if you have to change a soiled patient?”

spice colour scrubs are the standard here

8. Vocabulary EKG-ECG, MVC-RTC, Blood glucose/dexi-BM, BM-open bowel, urinal-bottle, sick-poorly, vital signs-observations

SAME report both in English, one in American English the other in British English

British English Report
American English Report

9. Other than an initial ABCDE (Airway, Breathing, Circulation, Disability, and Exposure) assessment, no other assessment or reassessment is done by a nurse.

10. Lastly nurses are trained specifically, not globally. An nurse trained in adults does not do pediatrics and visa-versa. And only a midwife would check for fetal heart tones.

Giving ourselves space to heal

The day Governor Inslee closed down the schools in Washington State was the last normal day I can recall. I was holding Alvin’s jacket as he was playing at the school playground. I wanted to leave, get home and start planning a solution to the crisis. I wanted to gain control to this unknown. I had to remind myself that I did not know the next time he would be allowed to play at the school playground.  So I started talking with a fellow parent. He was a fellow first line worker, a grocery clerk. He worked at night and slept during the day. He did not know what his days were going to look like now that the children were going to be doing remote learning, nor did I. That was the last normal day I can recall. I did not wear a mask or own one, I did not socially distanced.

On March 11, 2020 COVID was declared a pandemic. Alvin had stopped attending in person school and our society was seeped with fear.  As we cross over the one year mark, my body and mind are slowly decompressing all the emotions of the past year and yet they seem to be flooding back in all at once. I wonder how we are all doing. As the restrictions lighten up and the grips of confinement are loosened, how is our body releasing the emotions?

Recovery

After working 2-3 days, it takes another 3-4 days of being off before I feel like myself again. I am withered the first day off but eager to be outside in the fresh air. And allow my face to recover from wearing a mask twelve hours a day. The second day I attempt to blend into the family by cooking or helping with school work, but by mid-day, I need I nap. The third day, I finally wake up feeling rested, normal. I can exercise and be present with my family. The following day, back at work, the cycle starts all over again.

The last year has been rough, but the last two weeks have been really rough. The number of COVID cases at the hospital have dropped from 250 to 50 in less than a month. Things are getting better, the sun is out and Alvin started school this week. So why am I not getting better? Why am still drained, done, wiped out?

Survival

To survive I have distracted myself from the emotions. I am reminded of the peak of my postpartum depression in which I filled the days with task after task. Wake up, climb out of bed, shower, eat, dishes, nurse, play, laundry, bedtime, all detached. The days are carbon copies of each other. Every day I would move along, taking small steps until one day I started feeling again theses emotions that too many of us are now feeling. These emotions that are rising up, now that we can see the spark of light at the end of the tunnel. Happiness and relief are not waves crashing in, sweeping away the fear that has laid root in our communities, but rather a gentle knock at the door. A friend we are once again letting in.

We all have different stories from the last year and how it has affected us. We have different ways we have coped. For a couple of weeks, I went on a massive shopping sprees, only to return everything later. I needed to control something so I shopped.

What am I feeling…

But what are the feelings? Last week I started listing the emotions: lost, worried, guarded, hurting, scared, anxious, tired, overwhelmed (boiling over), drained, bored, disconnected, weeping, tense. After I had the list in hand, I sat with each one feeling it, pulling it from its roots. I cried, worried I would not be able to stop. With Alvin in the next room, I gathered myself and stopped, only to continue while I showered.  I grieved.

The year has been a loss, a literal one for many.  The loss of a family member, a job, a business, or the life we had planned. Without grief, we cannot mend and move forward. We need to give ourselves the space to grieve even though we have beauty lighting the way.  The angst of letting go of what you had hoped it would be and grabbing on to what is. Don’t get me wrong, I am still working on it every day.  Some days I am still decompressing from the emotions of being a frontline worker, but other days, I have the whole day in front of me with a lack of purpose. A replica of the day before, a decent life, so should I be grieving at all?

We actively state our gratitude nightly before dinner. Gary and I constantly remark that we could be in lockdown back home or in England, so why not have it in England? As Gary wisely says, we have made friend that have always been there, but we just didn’t know it until we moved. But now the emotions of moving during a pandemic are still fresh, and now the loneliness of being strangers in a new community are what I live with.

Reaching out, not alone

As we surpass the year mark, I am slowly learning to sit with these feelings. Feelings I have summed up as grief. If you look at the cycle of grief, you can say I am at the bargaining stage. I am reaching out to others, andI am very okay with it because it means that I, that we, are moving forward in the cycle, one tiny step at a time. And we are not alone.

The days will have purpose soon enough, and our “dream” life will not be in lockdown. But we still grieve for our previous life, and the people we miss back home, because without grief, we can’t embrace what is yet to come.  

Our silence about our grief serves no one. We can’t heal if we can’t grieve; we can’t forgive if we can’t grieve. We run from grief because loss scares us, yet our hearts reach toward grief because the broken parts want to mend

Brene Brown

As the NYT opinion video “Inside a Covid I.C.U., Through a Nurse’s Eye” ended I was hanging on to her final words.  I was looking for wisdom, hope, faith all the things I have been lacking. But the only thing she said was a simple thank you.  I wanted to reach through the screen and tell her, I feel yeah too. The trauma of the loss is still too near to articulate all that has been endured. So we just have to stick together, acknowledge each other’s grief, and say thank you for being there.

Why England?

Jumping Out

I clearly remember the day I first read those words. I was twenty three, in Kolkata sitting in a WiFi café, hiding from the heat, catching up on emails. Then my father’s email appeared with a simple remark “glad you jumped out of you fishbowl.”  I looked at it over and over again and then it hit me. I was out of my fishbowl. I looked around the café filled with many faces, a plethora of tones. My glance drifted onto the street where cows mingled with cars and an elegant woman’s sari lifted the dust off the ground. I strive for the uncomfortableness of swimming in new waters and that is the drive for our adventures.  

Since that moment I have continued to jump out of my fishbowl and now pull along with me Gary and Alvin. So why did we choose to jump out of the safety and comfort of our home? During a pandemic no less? Why England?

the sun room back home, our comfort
the place we gathered for morning coffee and long conversations with friend

 Questions frequently asked by friends and strangers alike. I often answered with a nonchalant “why not?” I attempt to wipe the smugness off my reply and explain further that it fits my motto in life. “You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough”-Mae West.  So why not live in another country, experiencing a similar yet different way of living and talking?

Nurses at work are especially intrigue as to why I left the higher wages, more autonomy, and a bigger home. And specifically how I arrived in Winchester.

Choosing England

After a year of research we chose England as our new home base. It was not our first choice. With Gary’s retirement in sight we looked at many options to fulfill our/my dream to live overseas. We considered military bases, embassies, contract positions and several locations. The main goal was to find a location that I could continue to work as a nurse.  As many of you know, I am Gary’s retirement plan (just joking). After narrowing it down in order of preference (New Zealand, England, and Australia) and after additional research we decided against New Zealand for one reason, our family back home. One emergency back home would deplete our savings. A last minute flight out of New Zealand is a pretty penny. England, next in line, ticked off many of the boxes and some we did not know existed.

Winchester chose us. The international nurse agency I worked with provided us three choices of cities to work/live in: London, Cambridge or Winchester. The agency, based out of London, guided me on my nurse application process, helped me prepare for my exams and assisted in finding me a job. Winchester was the most affordable; therefore it was our only realistic choice. A blessing in disguise since it is a marvelous city. 

The spring of 2019 we came to England and Winchester for the first time. As I mention to Gary, it felt like an episode of Twilight Zone. People were so kind and welcoming it felt awkward. We were not used to it but there was calmness in society. One of the main reasons I was motivated to move, even in the middle of a pandemic.

Winchester Cathedral

The stressors that have been lifted

Image being five years old in school in the middle of learning your letters, then stopped for a drill in which you must be silent and hide in the corner of the a dark classroom to protect yourself from a possible intruder. After staying as still as possible to protect your life, you then go back to learning your letters. For Alvin and many children this is part of their kindergarten education. Lockdown/active shooter drills are done at least quarterly along with fire and earthquake drills. Alvin was not prepared for this drill. Gary and I naively thought we would get some sort of notice letting us know prior to the first drill.  I laugh now thinking of about it. The drills have been around for over 15 years. The first drill affected Alvin hard, requiring us to go to the school and console him. In a recent study it showed active shooter drills increase depression, stress, anxiety for months.

Children from a young age in the USA are taught about fear and anxiety in a place that should be a safe haven. As a student from Marjory Stoneman High School stated, it was not a case of IF but WHEN it would happen next.

Lockdown, Lockdown. Lock the door.

Shut the lights off, Say no more.

Go behind the desk and hide.

Wait unit it;s safe inside.

Lockdown, Lockdown, it’s all done.

Now it’s time to have some fun!

Seen on a poster at Arthur D. Healey School, Somerville, Massachusetts. Sung to the tune of “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star

The true cost of Healthcare

The other layer that has been washed away is the cost of healthcare. In the United States we were one of the few fortunate enough to have incredible health care coverage through work but this is not just about us. Our family and people around us are affected by the high cost of health care coverage. How many people in the USA hold on to a job just because of the health care coverage? People here do not keep a job because they require coverage for their son’s asthma; they keep the job because it suits them.  An unforeseen illness or accident does not drain the family savings account.  In the USA few have the liberty to follow a dream job partly because you must first look at the health coverage it provides for your family. 

People here have an ease to them. I believe it has to do with their ability to choose a job that they want or love. Lorraine, a Canadian nurse I work with in Washington, once told me when you allow the artist to be artist, society smiles back at you. Having a “free health” care system, one which you pay into with taxes, allows people grow into who they are meant to be. I do know the argument “why should I pay the taxes for other people to stay home and not work” or be that artist. In my humble opinion, it is because health care is a human right. Not to mention the world is a bit sweeter when you are not forced to hold on to a job just for the health care coverage it may provided. It is our way of holding our community up, giving each other space to grow into whom we are meant to be.

Two gentlemen playing music in the town center mid week

Learning about Socialized Medicine

I also wanted to jump into socialized medicine. I wanted to experience it firsthand, not only as patient but as provider. Most of the site revolves around my experience in healthcare; therefore I will let you read more about this topic by strolling through the site. But I will say it has been nice seeing patients get treated for what they need and not necessarily what they want. I am no longer hunting for an admitting diagnosis that will be covered by Medicare or the insurance company. We are admitting because of the patients’ needs, even if it as simple as a social admission due to an elder living alone with increase falls. 

We hope to keep swimming in different waters and travel around the neighboring countries. On my bike ride home I am no longer seeing it as new. I have become accustomed to the whistle of the train and the brick lined homes. The land is becoming familiar and comfortable, as Bruce Cockburn sings “it’s my beat, in my new town.”

Soon it will be time to find a new bowl to swim in…

Not to teach you to suck egg…

Becoming a nurse in the UK is not a clear path. It can take many different routes. I see nursing through the prism of my training. A similar view but slightly distorted, with the light bent I see it a new.  Through conversations with staff members and through my own induction training I am learning a great deal what it means to be a nurse in England.

First, being a nurse in the UK does not hold the prestige as in the USA. We are literally blue collar workers. The task hands of the doctor. Professionalism in nursing is a new but growing concept. People choose nursing not for the money or benefits but for the desire to help. To learn the science of caring. And you hear that spirit in the nurse humming a favorite tune to her patient or when everything is stopped to make a strong cup of tea for a patient knowing, that is what truly what they need. I am surrounded by kin and it feels good.

Like most things in life right now COVID directed my induction training. Computer base modules dictated most of the mandatory training except for one in person day.  Even though computer training was grueling, I did learn new things. And familiar topics were presented under new light during the in person training..

What is Safeguarding?

Safeguarding is a new topic that may not have a US equivalent. Safeguarding is a term used in the United Kingdom and Ireland to denote measures to protect the health, well-being and human rights of individuals, which allow people — especially children, young people and vulnerable adults — to live free from abuse, harm and neglect.  If your internal alerts goes off you are required to fill out an online form that activates necessary resources to the person in need. I did not mind the long online training. I have come to view it as a safety net created by the government for those in need. The concept took rise after the death of Maria Cowell at the hands of her stepfather. Gaining traction with United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Children in 1990 which states that children are treated as human beings with a distinct set of rights.

Six Principle for Protection

The UK government created six principles to better guide the protection of not only children but vulnerable adults. First, empowerment: supporting and encouraging people to make their own decision. Second prevention, highlights the importance to take action before harm occurs. In the A&E we monitor harm such as such as neglect, obesity or tooth decay. Third, and perhaps more obvious, is protection. Protect child or vulnerable adult from violence, physical or emotional harm including providing support and appropriate representation if needed.  Protection not only from their parents or family but anyone that comes in contact with the person. Fourth proportionality, taking the least intrusive response to the risk presented, you will only get involved little as needed. Fifth and sixth are accountability and partnership. Working together and allocating responsibility to everyone involved or in contact with person in question.

Safeguarding lies not only in the hands of health care providers including paramedics but police, social workers and teachers, a collaboration for the vulnerable. The system itself consists of a team of agencies which work together giving children the childhood they deserve. Does this exit back home?

UK parliament in 2015 added another branch to safeguarding. Part of the Counter-Terrorism and Security Act 2015. It states “healthcare providers have due regard to the need to prevent people from being drawn into terrorism.” It’s designed to tackle the problem of terrorism at its’ roots. Preventing people from supporting terrorism or becoming terrorists themselves. An added layer of responsibility for healthcare workers but one I personally welcome.

The safeguarding system and process has intrigued me. And will continue to research and hope to bring that knowledge back home.

What is good end of life care?

A sliver of new material was the mandatory training about end of life care. A reminder to health care providers of all levels that death is a normal, gentle process if allowed to occur naturally. The course focuses on reclaiming the dying process. We learn fifty percent of death occurs in hospitals but not fifty percent of the population want to die in a hospital.  Most people want to be in familiar surroundings with family and friends.  The ice is broken on this difficult topic creating an ease for further discussion.

Checking for Life

Basic Life Support (CPR) traditionally trains you to check for breathing by placing your cheek against the victim’s lip, simultaneously looking for rise and fall of the chest wall.  We are in COVID times now. You wear a gown, a mask, face shield and must attempt to maintain a safe distance from the unknown victim. Therefore instead looking to see if a patient is breathing, you place your hand on their chest and “check for signs life.” Years of training out the window.

Moving and Handling

Another case of years of training out the window. The hands on training started with images of how not to move a patient. All the methods I have used for years assuming were best and safe practice. How was I supposed to “properly” move patients? Since I had arrived, according to the instructor, I had been man handling patients by pulling them up with a draw sheet. The training impressed me. To protect the nurse focus is given to the autonomy of the patient. The instructor reminds us that the moment you give a patient a gown they become ‘sick.’ By handing them the gown you confirm and add to their belief that they are helpless and ill and hence less inclined to help themselves. As healthcare providers we must remind them of their capabilities by simply asking them “how do you get around at home?” and “Show me.”

We learned how to guide a patient to lift themselves out of a chair. First their bum comes to the edge of the chair. They ground their feet. We next provide a gentle push to their lower back and stabilizing them by putting pressure on the opposite anterior shoulder. Another process we learned was how to guide a fallen patient off the floor into a sitting position without any physical help from the nurse. If you want to know these methods send me a message and I will share the magic. The underlining message from the training is parallel to the British healthcare, give power to the patient, let them do as much as they can on their own.

Nurse’s education

Talking to colleagues I learn there are many ways to become a nurse in the UK. Most people finish their formal education around age 16 after taking a general certification of education examination. At 16 you can take further education at “college” that offers vocational training, preparation to attend university, or nursing school. The majority of nursing schools are 2-3 years and unlike the US do not require prerequisites. Anatomy and physiology are taught along with nursing education. You can also become a nurse through an National Health System funded apprenticeship diploma through a mix of on the job training and classroom learning.

Nurses education is divided into four branches that do not intersect, adult nursing, pediatric nursing, midwifery or mental health. The qualification tests and educational requirements is distinct to each branch. A fellow emergency department (ED) nurse stated she prefers mental health nursing but understood the limitation if she only studied mental health. Her ultimate goal was to be ED nurse where you see patient in acute mental health crisis so she obtain her adult nurse degree as a primary and completed her mental health nursing as a secondary degree.

Emergency Nurse Practitioner

Emergency Nurse Practitioner (ENP) is a registered nurse who can assess, diagnosis, and prescribes treatment for patients who present with minor injuries and or illness. To become an ENP you require 3 years’ experience and must be a band 5/6 nurse. After a qualifying test, an interview that includes a presentation you get hired into the position. The training in our Trust is completed via Wessex Health Education England. Training is more of an apprenticeship with additional book learning. In the process you create a “portfolio” which verifies your depth of knowledge. The role of an ENP is subject to local variation in education and practice provision.  A fellow American nurse, Kyla Payne, recently completed the process and tell her story here.

Advance Clinician Practitioner

An ENP has a limited scope of practice compared to an Advance Clinician Practitioner (ACP).  Our version (American) of a nurse practitioner here is call is Advance Clinician Practitioner (ACP) ,Advance Critical Care Practitioner (ACCP) or Emergency Care ACP. Anyone registered as a healthcare professional with critical care experience and a bachelor’s degree can become an ACP. You apply to the ACP program via the Royal College of Medicine. ACPs trainee must complete a two-year program that leads to a postgraduate diploma or Master’s degree. Trainees are also employed by an NHS organization for the duration of their training. Teaching within hospitals is overseen by a local clinical lead that is responsible for the delivery of the clinical components of the training.  The education requirements are similar if not more than a US nurse practitioner.

What Band are you?

The band levels are another nuance I am still deciphering. All I can gather at this time is the higher the band the higher the authority and responsibility. And the hierarchy is palpable. I am a band 5 nurse, a standard staff nurse. Nurses with the knowledge base to triage or be in charge are band 6. I am very happy in my current pecking order.

One of the idioms I have come to learn, which was repeated by the respiratory therapist giving his lecture on noninvasive ventilation, is “I am not going to teach you to suck egg.” It translates to “I am going to tell you something you already know,” or do not offer advice to someone who has more experience than oneself. And even though the training is similar, I do feel I walked away with a bit more than I started, so maybe they will teach me the proper or just a different way to suck an egg?

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